Springboard: What is something you're passionate about? Does that passion give meaning to your suffering?
I'm passionate about my relationships. I take pride and find joy in the depth of the connections I share with people in my life. Often, I become closer to a friend, family member, or my partner because of challenging — even painful — conversations.
Those conversations are a form of suffering I find meaningful because they serve as a vehicle to a better understanding and deeper connection between two people, which is a worthy end.
If suffering is “part of striving toward something meaningful, toward something we value,” then what does shame mean to you? Is shame when one commits an act that goes against their values? When one suffers because they view their action as personally immoral (relative to what they define as personally moral)?
Hey Rachael, I like the way you frame this — that shame is a type of suffering that would come from failing to uphold one’s values/morals. I think I agree with you, but I might call that emotion regret or guilt instead, since I consider those to be more individual and internal than shame.
I tend to think of shame as a social, relational emotion. Usually, someone else puts shame upon you. Or, because of the assumptions you make about what other people think, you put shame on yourself. It’s rare that people feel shame without a witness for their actions (in that case, I’d call it guilt). Think of Adam and Eve in Eden. When they first fall, they cover their naked bodies in shame. I don’t think they’re ashamed of their bodies but ashamed that someone might see them naked (God).
I said “I tend to think,” but that’s not true at all. I’ve never given as much thought to shame as I did just now responding to your comment, so thank you for prompting that reflection!
I'm an atheist too and I find your reflection philosophical, you revealed an interesting correlation between suffering and passion. Pain and pleasure are all relative, if we never suffer pain we would never know passion.
Springboard: What is something you're passionate about? Does that passion give meaning to your suffering?
I'm passionate about my relationships. I take pride and find joy in the depth of the connections I share with people in my life. Often, I become closer to a friend, family member, or my partner because of challenging — even painful — conversations.
Those conversations are a form of suffering I find meaningful because they serve as a vehicle to a better understanding and deeper connection between two people, which is a worthy end.
If suffering is “part of striving toward something meaningful, toward something we value,” then what does shame mean to you? Is shame when one commits an act that goes against their values? When one suffers because they view their action as personally immoral (relative to what they define as personally moral)?
Hey Rachael, I like the way you frame this — that shame is a type of suffering that would come from failing to uphold one’s values/morals. I think I agree with you, but I might call that emotion regret or guilt instead, since I consider those to be more individual and internal than shame.
I tend to think of shame as a social, relational emotion. Usually, someone else puts shame upon you. Or, because of the assumptions you make about what other people think, you put shame on yourself. It’s rare that people feel shame without a witness for their actions (in that case, I’d call it guilt). Think of Adam and Eve in Eden. When they first fall, they cover their naked bodies in shame. I don’t think they’re ashamed of their bodies but ashamed that someone might see them naked (God).
I said “I tend to think,” but that’s not true at all. I’ve never given as much thought to shame as I did just now responding to your comment, so thank you for prompting that reflection!
My favorite line, “I refuse to read the lines assigned to us.”
Thank you, I’m glad to hear that it resonated.
I'm an atheist too and I find your reflection philosophical, you revealed an interesting correlation between suffering and passion. Pain and pleasure are all relative, if we never suffer pain we would never know passion.
Thanks for reading!
You are welcome, your writing is deep and philosophical, I enjoy reading it.